The Language Was Farcical

350 West Broadway has a lot to say. Words upon words wrap around its glass street-level exterior, the stuff of luxury condos. All that condo-porn verbiage.



There's more on the website, where the pages tell little stories starring a very superior couple having very superior conversations. There's even one where they poke fun at the inflated nature of other luxury condos' ad copy...



"The language was farcical. 'Here’s a good one!' she said excitedly, moving herself into an upright position in order to make the best delivery possible. 'Enwrap yourself in ultimate luxury.' She collapsed in a paroxysm of laughter. 'Enwrap! Who talks like that?'"



“I love the names. Luxitana, Titanium House, Elysium. Wake up in Heaven.”

“Here’s a new one. Zolofts. Leave Your Worries at the Door.”



“You know, they should ban the word exclusive from their ads. I mean, how exclusive can it be if there’s 75 units?”

“It’s like living on the QE2.”

“I’m glad we chose this place.”



Is this self-mockery? Hard to tell. They call the SoHo of the 1600s a "verdant swell."

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